Treasure Hunter Training Program

by Allison Wonderland

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  1. Whenever a snow emergency is declared, follow the snowplows around and completely dig out all the cars they plow in.
  2. As a big storm is about to hit, stand on your front steps with your back to the yard. Toss your car keys over your shoulder. Go back inside and then go find them the next day.
  3. Read up on Occam's Razor (All else being equal, the simplest solution tends to be the correct one).
  4. Do every word jumble, crossword puzzle, and search-a-word you can get your hands on.
  5. Make a list of all the things you can do with $10,000.
  6. Turn off the heat in your home for 16 hours a day.
  7. Only sleep three hours a night.
  8. Move all the snow from your back yard to your front yard.
  9. Spend all night on the Internet with total strangers discussing who killed JFK.
  10. Commit the Cooler Crew and Treasure Hunter's Guide Websites to memory.